I was going to try to make these weekly updates, but I just didn't have a whole lot to say last week, so I'll just post pregnancy updates when I can make them at least somewhat interesting.
Weeks Pregnant: 13
Baby Size: peach
Physical stuff: Nausea made a raging comeback last weekend, but I'm feeling much better now. However, I am feeling ridiculously weak. I can't even walk up the stairs without getting winded. Weird. I am also just starting to show in the morning. In the evening, I definitely look pregnant, but I think it's mostly baby bloat b/c it's back down by morning. Although, if you didn't know I was pregnant, I think I just kind of look fat. It's that awkward in-between phase.
Emotional stuff: I am so much more relaxed about this pregnancy than I was last time. When I first found out I was pregnant with Penny, I was initially so stressed that something would go wrong, but the very next day, I made the decision to enjoy being pregnant and just let myself get excited. I decided that I didn't want to waste a third or a half of my pregnancy being worried and reserved. I wanted to just be excited and enjoy this part of my life. I made that decision, but I don't think I really carried it out as well as I could have. We still waited awhile to tell people and had lots of ultrasounds early on, but I tried my best. This time around, I am doing a much better job of enjoying being pregnant without worrying about what could go wrong. We told our families right away and many friends too. We weren't actually offered an ultrasound at my first prenatal appointment, but I would have declined it anyway. When the midwife couldn't pick up the heartbeat on the doppler at that appointment, I didn't worry at all. When that happened with Penny, we freaked out and the doctor ordered an ultrasound to make sure everything was okay. This time, I expected it and figured we'd hear it next time. I just have a lot more peace and confidence. I have also really learned to listen to my body and trust my gut, and I think I would know if something was wrong. It's not that I'm in denial that tragedies happen–it's just that knowing myself, I don't think anything would make it easier if a tragedy did happen, and I really don't think it would matter if I had been excited and vocal versus reserved and worried. It would be devastating no matter what, and I would want to talk about it no matter what, so I might as well carry on and enjoy things.
Nursing/Boobs: We moved up the estimated weaning time to the first week of August, as my mom will be visiting then and I think it will be wise to try to time it when I have some extra hands. We're making some gentle progress on the weaning front. Penny is still nursing 3 times/day, but I've cut it down to one side/nursing session. She had always always nursed both sides every time since the month she was born, so we essentially cut her nursing in half this week. I started it in a morning session and told her beforehand "Just one side this time." She looked at me and said "One side", as in "I got it, Mom". Of course she protested after the one side was over, but Josh distracted her with a smoothie, and she was fine. It didn't really phase her much after that. Also, for her evening nursing, we started having Josh lay with her in her room after she nurses downstairs. She's been going to sleep for him at night without a problem the last few nights. I'm really proud of how she is adjusting to the changes we're making, and I have lots of hope that the rest of the process will go smoothly. It seems like after a day or two, it just becomes her new normal. I am sort of using the principals in The No-Cry Sleep Solution, except for with the goal of weaning instead of sleeping. The whole idea is to look at where you are (i.e. nursing 3 times/day both sides) and look at where you want to get to (i.e. weaning). Then break up the distance between the two into the smallest steps possible. In this way, each step is only a tiny difference from what was happening before, so it's a gentle change, but by taking tiny steps, you eventually get to your goal. It's working for us so far.
Birth prep: I had my first appointment at the birth center a few days ago, and all was well. We got to hear the heartbeat for the first time, which was super exciting. The midwife is fantastic. The facility is gorgeous, and I am super excited about our choice. The biggest thing I'm worried about is figuring out who will be available to be with Penny when I go into labor. When you don't have any family in town, it's a little tricky.
Baby prep: We've finally organized and sorted all of the last "clutter hot spots" in the house. It feels so good to have gotten rid of everything we didn't need and to have organized everything we have. We have lots of storage bins in the basement that are all labeled and sorted, which will make it much easier to figure out (and locate) what we need for the new baby. I have all of Penny's old clothes organized in bins by size, which will be great if we have another girl.
Gender stuff: I am still holding strong that it's a boy, and I am going purely on mama gut instinct. I think all of the– you're carrying high, you're carrying low, you're glowing, you're puking, you're haggard, the heartbeat is fast/slow, you crave salty/sweet/sour, you feel the same/different from last time blah blah blah, so you must be having a BOY/GIRL–is a bunch of bullshit. I love to hear people's guesses, but I don't like it when they have some stupid reason. The only reason I really find acceptable is something like "I don't know–it's just my gut" or "that's the energy I'm getting." I know, I am such a hippie. When I was teaching during my last pregnancy, I polled all of my students, and it was about 50/50 (maybe 1-2 more votes for girl), but none of the kids said anything stupid like "you're carrying high." Just one more reason why kids are awesome. Josh, on the other hand, now thinks it's a girl. He started off thinking girl, then switched to boy, and is now back to girl. I think he's trying to cover all of his bases.